Shanellee

Teen mother with baggage 

I was 15 when I got pregnant with my daughter. Very much still a baby myself. I’m the oldest of three other children and my mother was a young mom barely 35 at the time. This was a generational thing. I didn’t know much about my body or what life would hold so I very much relied on my intuition and what I picked up from reading books. Soon as my mother found out I was kicked out to live with friends from school and a couch here and there. I learned quickly life doesn’t care about you and men will prey upon you. 

I had been sexually assaulted 4 times before I turned 21. Who would I tell? Who cared anyway?? This baggage took me into the adult entertainment world where I would lose myself on the pole nothing mattered when I was whining to the music and floating mid-air dollars were falling off my body. That’s what life and love were about right? Securing that bag? Well that I did. My looks became my identity and I knew how to use my womanly curves to my advantage. No one knows the many nights I cried and hated myself because the money then became not enough to fill the void of what I was longing for, acceptance. I had been rejected by my mother and father so I looked for life in all the wrong places. Failed relationship after another trying to figure out why am I only good enough to have sex with but not good enough to maintain a relationship Which led me to a drug habit that still didn’t settle my soul. 

It wasn’t until that little girl I had, had faced a demon that wasn’t her own but mine that I passed along. Suicide. I was so busy throwing my pity party that I never paid attention to the one she was throwing herself sneaking out late shutting herself in her room trying to fit it arguing with me calling out my flaws.. feeling lost ugly depressed and alone. How could I teach her anything if I felt these same feelings?

So I let GOD in my life that day and allowed him to be head of my life and decided to forgive myself and love me something I was yearning for I had to give it to myself so I could teach her this very lesson. Out birthed SELAH QUEEN my self-care line I had to learn to pull myself out of this dark place and back into the light where I belong and and doing so I was able to set the example of what a STRONG BLACK VIRTUOUS woman looks like. What self-respect looks like and how self-love feels and looks. And now look GOD blessed me with a grandson. The man needed to be planted in our life that will take the rejection into acceptance 🦋🦋.

Hi I'm The Founder/Director of this Amazing organization. I am honored to be Truthful and share my Testimony. 

I became pregnant at 19, one of the pros of my unplanned situation, was that; I had graduated and was out of my parent's home. The con of this situation was that, the Father was older than me & didn't want me to have my son, we weren't married, nor was I financially ready . I was determined to have my son because 6 months prior, I was told I couldn't conceive due to fibroids on my ovaries & a tilted uterus. I didn't use any type of birth control because they didn't agree with my body. I didn't use condoms because I was in love, young and naive. 

My baby's father was determined to persuade me to have an Abortion. He even gave me money to go on with the procedure. I took that money and went shopping and moved with my grandmother. Throughout my pregnancy I moved from home to home due to my defiant behavior from a broken heart. 

I was a disappointment to my mother because she had High Hope's for me. She wanted me to attend college, be married and Prepared financially before having a child early like she did. Before I had my son, I moved into RV Taylor Projects. I was excited because I was doing responsible things on my own. Once I had my son, I had no one to explain postpartum depression and things your body go through after having a child. I suffered tremendously from lack of Knowledge. 

5 months later I was pregnant with my second child. I hid it as long as I could because I knew I would definitely be a disappointment to my mother once again. I struggled with wanting children to fill my voids of: Loneliness, Depression, feeling unloved and more. I knew my Children would bring me happiness and Love but I definitely wasnt thinking of the hardships that comes along with parenthood. 

If I could change anything in my past, I honestly wouldn't because my hardships of being a Young Parent Prepared myself for my Title and Purpose of today💜👣

I am honored to have Reason in This Season. I Thank The Divine Light for Guidance & Guiding me to be The Change I'm looking for. 

Hello my name is Trina Smith & I'm on The Board of Ambitiously Him Her King Foundation.

I was 17 when I found out I was pregnant. I hid my pregnancy from my family for almost 6 months. I didn't want to be a disappointment to my mom because she was Spiritual and dedicated to the church and I didn't want to embarrass her. I finally told her 2 days before I graduated high school only because she bought me some jeans I couldn't wear on senior autograph day.

After all the crying and arguring was over I gave birth on August 27, 1999 to a beautiful baby girl name Wakila Angelik. 

 I became pregnant at the age of 19. Young and so nervous that I was going to fail as a mother because, I didn't know much. I cried many nights but prayed for strength. My mother and father promise me they would be Right by my side.

  My baby was 8 months when I discovered I was pregnant again with my second child. At the age of 21 and a mother of two, I knew I had to grow up and be the best mother and role model I could be. I got my own apartment, just found a job and I'm working on getting my GED and Even though I became a mother at a young age, I must say with God's help I'm doing good. I'm  raising my two kids as a young and single mother now. I have 1 year old name Toby and a 4 month old name Madison.

My kids are my pride and joy they put a smile on my face every morning. I know if I could do it, I believe you can too. 

My name is Marsha Sewell & I was a teen mom. I haven't been opened about my story until now. 

Growing up your parents did not talk about sex, let alone tell you, not to do so. What we didn’t know is, if it (SEX) wasn’t talked about; you really didn’t know about it (SEX), until you were approached with it (SEX). I lost my virginity at the age of 14 & the crazy part is; it wasn't what people said it was. My first experience was nothing, I wanted or had to experience again.

Let's move forward.... I’m now in high school and I have a boyfriend yet. I was 16 when we met and we were inseparable & in love. We did and went everywhere together. Now I was very sexual active with him. Now, let me remind you guys, we were together daily and I always wore baggy clothes. The only time I wore different clothes is if, I went out with my friends.

Now, I didn’t know I was pregnant I did not know about ovulation, symptoms of pregnancy or anything of that nature.

I just knew if you missed a period you were pregnant. Yes personally didn’t have much knowledge about sex or pregnancy. I don’t even remember missing a period.

So my boyfriend grandmother call my mom,  about march 1997 and told her I was pregnant and I’m like NOOOOOO WAYYYYYYY. When I tell you i was scared and I didn’t know what to think?!?!

 I think I conceived in August because when I found out I was pregnant I was about 6 or 7 months. I never showed, I never felt a baby move, I never remembered missing a cycle or anything. When I found out, everyone found out too!

My mom would say some cruel hurtful things when I was pregnant because she was hurting as a mother. Who wants to see their baby, have a baby? She didn’t want me, to have a baby young and be labeled. Which I didn't think mattered, because I, wasn't popular or known; so who would even care? To be honest I had no friends, just my boyfriend. I was not mad at myself or disappointed because this was something I had done to myself & I was going to deal with it.

I literally had my baby two months after finding out I was pregnant. May 21, 1997 I had my baby; I had turned 17 on the 3rd of May, so my baby girl was my birthday present.

Since the day of Motherhood, my life and I was changed that day, forward.

My son was conceived when I was only 13 years old. I was 14 years old when I gave birth to him. In a time that I thought I would be so alone, I found the most unconditional love that I have ever known. I had never seen anyone look at me with as much admiration and wonder as when he opened his tiny sweet eyes for the first time and looked into mine. I was given the choice to place him for adoption, and while that choice is right for many people, I knew that it was not the right choice for us. Raising him was not always the most simple thing to do. There was a serious learning curve. Being older now, and having gone on to have two more children I know that the learning curve exists no matter your age and no matter how many children you have. Raising my second and third child was just as nerve wracking, messy, and beautiful as raising my first. My son is now a wonderful, and hilarious 10 year old boy. I consider my self so blessed to have this beautiful soul in my life. One of my life's biggest successes is raising him.

- Hope Brown

I have to reach back 20 years ago to think about a time that’s difficult to think about, so bear with me. 

I first became pregnant at the age of 18. 

The man who would eventually become my husband was a decade older than me. Friends and family all disapproved, but I was blinded by love and thought I knew better. When everyone found out I was pregnant, they immediately deemed it a mistake and said that getting an abortion was the only logical option.I saw their reasoning but also felt an emotional bond with the child I was carrying.  I went through with the abortion, but it was unfortunately a very traumatic experience for me. At the same time, my insurance was taken from me, so all of my medication abruptly stopped. 

I had experimented with drugs before, but too much happened all at once, so I dove headfirst into using meth. I was able to ignore what had happened, and what I was going through. It didn’t take me long for drugs to completely take over my life, and my partner was facilitating the abuse. 

A few months into my drug use, I was broke and homeless, and my mental health was completely unstable. I thought that I may have been pregnant again, but the test was negative so I resumed my activities as normal. I started bleeding heavily and continued for about 6 weeks straight until I had a nervous breakdown and ended up being admitted to a psychiatric ward. That’s when I found out I was 9.5 weeks pregnant, and that I had also miscarried a twin. 

I was again urged to get an abortion, but I couldn’t make that decision at that time. The pleas continued until I was 4 or 5 months pregnant. The pregnancy was difficult. I had hyperemesis gravidarum, so instead of morning sickness, it was 24/7. I could barely function and started having hallucinations. Throughout those 9 months, I had practically no support, it was so overwhelming. There was food insecurity, my husband spent money on drugs and cheated on me regularly. 

My labor lasted 72 hours, and the birth was difficult, we were both very ill and had to stay in the hospital for a week. 

I was 19 when I had my firstborn. I'd like to say it got better after the birth, but it didn’t. I had severe postpartum depression, which I later learned was postpartum psychosis for me. Again came the urging by family to give up my child for adoption. But there was never any offering of help, even when I asked for it, BEGGED for it. I was very quickly addicted to drugs again, and desperately wanted to go to rehab. My addiction eventually led to my being arrested and charged with a felony. Not long before I was sentenced to 3 years probation, at 23. I found out I was pregnant again. I didn’t want to bring my child into a situation like that, so I decided to have an abortion. I felt I made the right decision at that time, and though I mourn the loss, it would have made life so much harder for the child I was already struggling to raise. My firstborn is now almost 19, the same age as when I had them, and my youngest is almost 9. Being a mother has not come easily to me at all, and I still struggle. Part of me wishes, deeply, that I had waited until I was older to become a mother because it was so very hard. I only hope that by sharing my story another teen mom who may be grappling with mental illness or addiction or an unsupportive family can know that she isn’t alone.

-Jess